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Plan the Perfect Wedding Rehearsal Dinner

Stressed out about the day before your ‘I Dos’? Steer clear of these wedding rehearsal dinner planning mistakes that some couples often make and you'll have an unforgettable time before your Big Day.


'Tis the day before your wedding and you're an absolute ball of stress. Not only do you have life changing nuptials to get to, you're also on the eve of hosting one of the biggest events of your life. Has the 15th/final version (hopefully) of the guest list been given to the venue? Are the centerpieces ready? Have all the bridesmaid dresses been altered? Has your great aunt Lucy been picked up from the airport? And on top of that, you have the wedding rehearsal dinner to get to.

Whether it’s an informal gathering or not, your wedding rehearsal dinner is an important piece of your whole wedding planning process. And just like on your big day, you want to (at least try) to have a blast and give all of your guests an unforgettable experience.

One of the best ways to make sure that you, your partner, and your guests will all have a great time is to avoid these typical wedding rehearsal dinner planning mistakes.

Top wedding rehearsal dinner mistakes: don’t let these happen to you!

9 common wedding rehearsal dinner planning mistakes

  1. Not planning your budget ($) accordingly

  2. Forgetting to give some attention to your wedding party

  3. Choosing the wrong rehearsal dinner venue

  4. Not making the dinner in line with your wedding theme

  5. Not coordinating any rehearsal dinner speeches

  6. Making the event too long

  7. Forgetting to confirm the guest list beforehand

  8. Forgetting to make it enjoyable!

  9. Asking for some help with the planning process

So, whether you want an all-out bash or an intimate gathering with some of your most cherished wedding guests, it's important to make a list of key points to consider when planning your rehearsal dinner. To help you, we've done our homework and collected these 9 typical wedding rehearsal dinner planning mistakes that couples make. Don’t let these common ‘oh-nos’ happen to you!


1. Not planning your budget accordingly

We're all budget-minded nowadays, and we totally get ya. That's why an important wedding rehearsal dinner planning mistake not to make is forgetting to set a realistic budget and sticking with it as much as possible. Heck, even try and go under budget if you can swing it! There are so many costs involved with the planning of a big wedding event, so it’s important that you guys stay on top of the budget.

The main thing is to have that $ allocated for the event and go through all of the moving parts of the rehearsal dinner, so that you and your planning partner can stay on track as much as possible. Let’s face it, the rehearsal dinner is basically a mini version of your wedding day, so use the outline of your wedding as your framework for setting the budget and other big factors in the planning of your rehearsal dinner.


2. Forgetting to give some extra love to your wedding party

One of the best parts of hosting such a big bash like a wedding are the people who are standing by you throughout the whole process. That's why your wedding rehearsal dinner is actually the best time to give your wedding party that extra special shout-out that they so deserve.

By the way, your wedding rehearsal dinner doesn't necessarily have to be an actual dinner! Break with convention (that's what we're all about at Hand-Me-Gowns) and host a rehearsal lunch. Or, you can even transform the traditional rehearsal dinner into a fabulous brunch! A more informal rehearsal dinner can even be more interesting and fun for yourself, your partner, and even your guests.

One of my favorite memories as a bridesmaid was the lunch after the morning wedding rehearsal. Along with treating us to a delicious lunch, the brides gave a speech with a thank you to the bridal party, and gave us each personalized gifts. It was a great day for our tightly-knit 'I Do Crew'.

This unique twist on the traditional rehearsal dinner into an intimate rehearsal lunch proved to be an amazing way to spend some quality time with your wedding party.

Top rehearsal dinner mistake couples tend to make: not choosing the right venue!

3. Choosing the wrong venue

It doesn’t matter whether you decide on a rehearsal dinner or brunch or lunch (pitching the idea of a rehearsal dessert! You heard it here first, folks). Whatever the venue for the event, just make sure you choose it well.

One wedding rehearsal dinner planning mistake you don't want to make is booking the wrong venue, as you don't want a location that misses some of the most important practical parts to make the event a success (and as stress-free for you as possible!).

To avoid any mishaps, take some time to consider these key planning factors:

  1. The distance from the wedding day location

  2. How accessible the venue is for all your guests

  3. What's the parking situation?

  4. Does the venue vibe with your wedding theme?

Whether the wedding rehearsal dinner spot is at an indoor location like a restaurant or you’re going for a garden party type thing, use the planning checklist above and make sure the venue checks all of the boxes. Basically, you want your guests to get there safely, be able to leave fairly easily, and get a little preview of what the big party will look and feel like the following day.


4. Not making the rehearsal dinner in line with your wedding theme

To add a little something to our last point, it’s important to note that planning a rehearsal dinner that's out of touch or just simply unaligned with the theme and tone of your wedding is one of the typical rehearsal dinner planning mistakes you don’t want to make. This important wedding event will fulfill its purpose if it’s on-brand with the whole wedding theme. It kinda makes things easier to plan, actually, if everything is in sync theme-wise. And we don't necessarily mean simply color scheme here, but more the tone and the overall vibe of the rehearsal dinner.

Think back to the idea of a more informal rehearsal lunch for the wedding party and how it was in line with the tone they wanted to set, which was a more intimate, personal, and fun (with some fancy parts thrown in for good measure) wedding experience for all.

When you start the process of planning your wedding with your partner, ask yourselves the big questions like, “what’s the story we want to tell our guests?” “What do we want to express to the world with our wedding?” And once you do, planning of the important wedding events like your rehearsal dinner will start to fall into place.

Wedding rehearsal dinner planning mistakes that couples make

5. Not coordinating any rehearsal dinner speeches

Another way to keep with the tone of your overall wedding theme is to take the time to craft some rehearsal dinner speeches. Having a couple of speeches scheduled for the wedding rehearsal dinner – whether they are from the couple, the wedding party, or the closest family/friends of the couple – will really help keep the event going.

So if you want the Best Man and/or the Maid of Honor to say a little something, ask them and go for it. And as the guest(s) of honor, if you want to give a speech to your special guests, the rehearsal dinner (or rehearsal dessert!) is one of the best chances you'll get to do this.


6. Making the rehearsal dinner too long

The reality is that you have a BIG day ahead, so one mistake you don't want to make is having the wedding rehearsal dinner go too long. It’s basically a meal with a few extra moments thrown in, so it doesn’t have to be an entire half-day event, y’all!

One of the most common questions asked on wedding rehearsal dinner planning is, “how long does a rehearsal dinner last?” So, this means that the timing of your rehearsal dinner should really be considered in the planning process.

As a good estimate, we recommend that it’s best to keep the rehearsal dinner at 3-4 hours in length. This will give you time for some intros and chit chat, eating time, speeches, gift giving, toasts, and then your ‘Sayonaras’ for the wedding day.

You can plan the wedding rehearsal dinner of your dreams!

7. Not confirming the guest count beforehand

You have your seating plan mapped out for the wedding reception, right? Don't forget to confirm the guest list for the rehearsal dinner, either. This is one of the very common rehearsal dinner planning mistakes that you definitely don’t want to happen to you.

At least two weeks before the event, check that the guest count is finalized and send it over to your venue so that you’re not scrambling at the last minute. On that note, when booking your rehearsal venue, it’s best to check what their ideal timeline is so that you’re aligned with their expectations.


8. Forgetting to make it enjoyable!

We know we know, it can be hard to enjoy YOUR OWN WEDDING when so much of the stress is on your shoulders, but you deserve to have some fun after all that planning, budgeting, spreadsheets, Pin-ning, and money spent.

That’s why we 100% recommend giving yourself the grace to enjoy the entire process, from the bridal shower to the bachelorette party to the wedding rehearsal dinner and even the ceremony and reception. Want to have fun on your own wedding day? Rehearse it at the dinner.


9. Asking for some help with planning

Delegate! That's what the pros are there for. If you and your partner are feeling overwhelmed, don't be afraid to reach out to the Type As and even the Type B personalities in your wedding party for some planning assistance. And if you have a wedding planner booked, see if their planning package comes with some hours to help out with the rehearsal dinner.

Other family members and close friends might also be more than happy and honored to help you out with some rehearsal dinner planning if you're feeling like it's all too much.

Feel a little less stressed out, now? Follow this checklist and you’ll be on your way to throwing a great wedding rehearsal dinner. Whether your guest list for the event is 15 or 55, just make sure to pay attention to those little details (and have some fun while you’re at it, okay?!).


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